Yes, I Am Stubborn

Yes, I am stubborn, when i make a decision, i will stick to it,
Yes, I have ZERO tolerance for stupid excuses and nonsense, and it is very difficult to convince me...
i do not give myself excuses to fail,
and hence, i do not give people around me many chances to fail...
i always think that people who find themselves reasons to fail, are those people who are not strong nor brave enough to face the truth,
so, you know why u failed, so there should not be a second time right??
when there is a second n third time, it is clearly you are not an achiever.

i have always been tough on myself,
because of this, i have always shown a strong and tough face,
i seldom show my weak and vulnerable side...
this is because i do not want people to see me failing...
it is because my ego do not let me fail...
it is not because i cannot fail,
when you want me to accept your nonsense for not able to achieve the goal,
then please give me room to fail too,
then i want you to tell me how does it feel to be let down and disappointed again and again...

i have never been unreasonable,
it is just very difficult to convince me,
so before you want to talk to me,
please prepare your script,
do not give me the opportunity to 'shoot' you back,
because i will not care for your pride,
if you want to act dumb, then you have no pride, so why should i care?
and most importantly,
please USE YOUR BRAIN before talking to me!!!!!!!!!

一步一步慢慢来~

我只想一步一步慢慢地得到我想要的东西,
其余的我不想多想...
我才21,想拥有的东西太多了,多得数不清.
我现在要做的,就是一步一步慢慢的争取我想要的.
爱情我不要再想了,该来的会来,是我的我也躲不掉.
只是现在,我很清楚我要的是什么,不要的我也骗不了自己.

RIght n Wrong

how do we differentiate right from wrong?
how do we know what is really right and wrong?
we do many things unconsciously, and many times we do what we thought it was alright, just to find out in the end what we did was wrong...
many times, we need to take into consideration many things and many ppl, and in the end, we might not find the perfect decision to please everybody..
many times, we cannot do what we want to do, because life is not as simple as 1, 2, 3...

i know wat i'm doing now is not right,
and i know one day, somebody might get hurt, including me...
i know one day i will need to pay for my actions,
and i know that day will be painful for many people...

when that day comes,
please forgive me for not having the courage to do the 'right' thing now,
when that day comes,
please forgive me for being selfish...

trust me, i have tried..
trust me, i have made effort...
but in the end, i choose to go with the flow..
because at this moment,
i really don't want to think what is right and what is wrong...

Be Strong..

to all the girls out there who are hurt by their idiotic boyfriends, in any way..
have the courage to be strong, as how you found the courage to love,
time will pass n wound will be heal, as how time made you grew the love you had for him..
the only person that can save you, is you yourself..
you are your own saviour~~

seeing my friends falling in a rut, and all i can do is to be there for them, make me feel so hopeless, yet it made me realise how strong i am, to be still able to hold on to myself, and not let my world fall apart..

but i wonder, how long can i continue this??

PS: Wah Wah n Cole... Love you~~ Stay Strong~~

Mid Term

mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term
mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term mid term

the mid term stress is catching up.....

My Last War

i'm not very good at expressing myself,
that is y i keep quiet most of the time,
i understand ur problems and difficulties,
that is y i tried my best to be understanding,
but as years past,
it seem to be a bad habit,
taking advantage of me, forgetting my needs jus to satisfy others,

yeap~~ i promise,
i promise this would be my last fight,
i doubt i would have the energy to continue fighting anyways,
n i think i owe everybody around me some peace n quiet...
i know it sucks to give up so fast,
but i don see the point of fighting anymore when my messages isnt goin anywhere..
no point of talking, no point of discussing,
u n i are d same,
we make our decisions n we stick to it, no matter wat, neither of us are compromising,
hence, i promise u, this will be my last fight,

my last war with u to fight for wat i wan,
my last war with u in hopes u'll understand how i feel,
my last war with u to prove to me what i think n feel is wrong,
my last war with u to prove to me u still love me~~

mayb its because i've neva said anything before,
that is y u got shocked when i told u,
mayb its because i've been so quiet before n all the tension n emotions jus build up in me,
i tend to burts like a volcano errupting, that is y u got taken aback,
i've neva intended for anybody to get hurt,
i've neva intended to build up so much stress for everybody,
i've neva intended to make u cry,
i jus need u to understand,
how much i'm dying inside...
in order to stop feeling the pain, i need to either shut my heart, or leave the cause,
do not...
do not force me to leave...
for when i make a decision,
u know best i will stick to it,
for when i make a decision,
u know best there is no turning back..
thus, this will be my last fight with u,
my last fight for things i wan,
n your last chance to prove urselves...

I Believe In Myself

this won't be another emo post, i promise ^^
as my title suggest.. yes, i do believe in myself, more than anybody else..
i believe on my judgment on people,
i believe in my decisions,
i believe my instincts,
n most of all, i believe in my heart..
when too many people get involve in something, it always makes it more confusing,
other people can only provide suggestions and their opinions,
but it is me who can only make the decision,
n it is me who need to bear the consequences..
hence, i always ALWAYS believed in myself.
because it is only me, who will stay true to myself,
it is only me, who will not lie to myself....
since i believe in myself so much,
so i need you all to have a little faith in me too :)
believe in whatever decision i make...
even its not the perfect one,
even you all can't seem to understand,
even somebody might get hurt...
i really need you all to trust me,
believe in me...

Makan Makan~~

because we r a bunch of spoilt kids :P
d gang plans to have a makan-makan outing each week~~
it would be held every friday and d venue would change each week..
any interested parties can feel free to join us, the more the merrier!!!
this would be a great opportunity for us to bond (even though we see each other practically everyday!!)
n to do wat we do best - gossips!!!!!
hahaha...
we are all going to graduate soon, n we won't know how long we can do this..
hopefully we can continue this after we graduate ^^
cheers~ friends forever!!!!

让懂你的人爱你

my buddy Joe sent me this song to 'shoot' me~~
quite meaningful though~~ ^^

你忘不了开始的甜蜜
却怕想起未来的情景
他是会认错的听你哭泣音
直到下次又不小心忘记
你解释着孤寂和无力
他却相信那只是情绪
当埋怨都变得没有意义
你想留住的是什么东西
离开爱过的人和回忆
怎能不挣扎不痛心
但是一个最难的决定
往往是最好的决定
让懂你的人爱你　
重选一份值得坚持的感情　
爱只是一种一点点冲动就可以　
了解却少些默契都不行
让懂你的人爱你　
别舍不得过去只为了可惜　
相爱不只是走进对方的生活　
更要能走进彼此的生命

I Feel Like Crying..

nothing happened, i just felt like it...
a sudden urge for me to shed tears for no apparent reasons...
i'm not feeling well,
i'm not well inside nor outside..
i'm so sick i just wish i could cry it out loud!!!!
even though u see me smiling everyday,
but deep inside, i'm crying to be free...
i've neva said i'm ok,
i've neva said i'm fine,
i don need you to comfort me...
i just need you to be there to hear me cry...
i think one of the reason i couldn't get out of this rut is because i've neva really face the problem.
i always seemed 'OK' after the break up, going clubs, keeping myself busy, neva had i once say i missed him, but my world goes a little offbeat each time he calls, he couldn't let me go, testing my determination and patience to leave him once n for all.
my brain and my heart can't seem to agree on my next course of actions...
well my brain clearly forbids me to see him again,
every inch of my hearts would jus love for me to forget about everything and go back to him, forgetting all d pain, forgetting all d tears, forgetting all d ppl i would disappoint..
i'm actually quite amazed of myself for still being in sane, for still trying to keep every bit of me together..
its tough work though, and i'm not sure how long i can keep this going.. :)
i jus feel like crying, crying my heart out for once and for all..
i have always resists d urge to do so because i don wan anybody to worry about me..
but wat about me?? T.T
oh gosh... i really need my ciggies~~