nothing happened, i just felt like it...
a sudden urge for me to shed tears for no apparent reasons...
i'm not feeling well,
i'm not well inside nor outside..
i'm so sick i just wish i could cry it out loud!!!!
even though u see me smiling everyday,
but deep inside, i'm crying to be free...
i've neva said i'm ok,
i've neva said i'm fine,
i don need you to comfort me...
i just need you to be there to hear me cry...
i think one of the reason i couldn't get out of this rut is because i've neva really face the problem.
i always seemed 'OK' after the break up, going clubs, keeping myself busy, neva had i once say i missed him, but my world goes a little offbeat each time he calls, he couldn't let me go, testing my determination and patience to leave him once n for all.
my brain and my heart can't seem to agree on my next course of actions...
well my brain clearly forbids me to see him again,
every inch of my hearts would jus love for me to forget about everything and go back to him, forgetting all d pain, forgetting all d tears, forgetting all d ppl i would disappoint..
i'm actually quite amazed of myself for still being in sane, for still trying to keep every bit of me together..
its tough work though, and i'm not sure how long i can keep this going.. :)
i jus feel like crying, crying my heart out for once and for all..
i have always resists d urge to do so because i don wan anybody to worry about me..
but wat about me?? T.T
oh gosh... i really need my ciggies~~
We had Gathering Finally....
16 years ago
5 comments:
girl, sometimes we need to face problems that appear in our life... i noe its hard for you to forget everything, but i just hope that u do take care of yourself and do something that will really make you happy alwayz... no smoking wor k? hugs...:)
Cheer up!! :)
Brave up, these days are hard, but there's no need to indulge urself in those things, you need friends to listen to you, not ciggies...
We're here to help u out...
Cheerz
hey girl...after reading ur blog,i realised that i dunno u well at all...u r actually completely diff to the alexiss that i knw,sorry that most of us failed to do what frens should do - care. sory to only b there when we hv fun and laughter but fail to be there when u need our care...well,u do have our support and love, will never forsake u...but u need to do sumting as well,stop ur ciggies...throw them away,love urself
hikss... i'm so touched n ashamed of myself~~ i neva meant to make u guys worry about me~~ Kendrick.. ofcoz we should ALWAYS have fun.. haha.. life is too short to stay emo :P no worries~~ my buddies will take care of me~~ already made deal with them about my cigs ^^ cheers~~ thanks everybody for caring!!!!
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