T.R.U.S.T

T - Truth
R - Reliability
U - Us
S - Sincere
T - Trust

these are the values that should exist in a relationship, without these, the relationship is meaningless, yet 'burdening' for the people involved.

trust need to be gain and earned, it is not to be given lightly... when you betray my trust, do not expect to be forgiven so easily, feelings are hurt and wound would not heal so easily... the scar will be there forever, to remind us of the damage done.

i believe, and truly do, that men do not change overnight.
when i sense your changes, i just kept quiet, my thought begin to wonder, trying to find good explanations and reasons for your changes.
when i believe i am deceived, i would not confront you straight away, because with all the lies you told, i cannot really differeantiate the truth from the lies..
i need to find out, i need to know..
i need to confirm my suspicions..
i believe in myself, i believe in my instincts...

if you don't love me as much, please let me know..
please let me go as i have beg you so many times..
men are selfish, but i sincerely hope that a conscious part of you would realise how hurt i am..
for once, please be truthful to me...
let me know, and please let me go...

people rarely marry the ones they truly love, they always marry the 'right' one, who conveniently is at the right time...
maybe we are meant to be... we are meant to be apart...

Kar Wai's Theory

i think i could relate to kar wai's new found theory,
the theory of 'Stranger-Ship in a Relation-Ship' ^^

i cannot find any words to describe my current situation,
my life now at this state can only be described as 'messy', and even that cannot fully picture what is happening...

i have never felt so hopeless, so uncertain, so.... empty as today..
we love each other so dearly, and yet we chose to stay apart,
no explanation was needed, no words were spoken,
we understood, this is the best for both of us.
even though i can see the love slipping away from us, i could not decide whether to hold on to it, or to just let it flow, such dilemma.
as i had said, i choose to go with the flow...

this is when the Stranger-Ship arised in our Relation-Ship...
we were once so closed, no secrets between us, we could discuss about everything, i would miss you every minute, wondering what you are up to, the bond between us was so strong, our dearest friends are still very shocked why we broke up in the first place.

we broke up because our personalities were so alike and yet so different.
we broke up because our vision and life path for the future were so alike but yet so different.
i know it makes no sense, but then, this is the strange part of the relationship.

i understand, we could never be like before,
i understand, letting each other go is only a matter of time,
we are still stubbornly grasping on to something, because we know, if we let go, we will be left with nothing at all...
what is that thing, we do not know, this is the uncertainty we are willing to gamble on.
maybe if we hold on to each other long enough, something would happen to bring us back together again,
maybe if we hold on to each other long enough, we would understand that we could still live together happily despites our differences.

this is the strange part of the relationship...
deep inside us (at least for me), we know this would not work,
i know that we are just wasting time, hoping it would be easier and less hurtful to let go,
we made an agreement to not see each other so often,
because we knew the flames will start burning again soon ^^
we love each other so much, that we understand being together would only hurt each other more...
we love each other so much, we are willing to let go....